Reflecting on my Camino

A look back on my 175-mile walk a month after returning

My Camino route - click the image to see and interact with the Google Map!

Yesterday was the first time I reviewed my blog posts from my recent Camino Portugués since returning home from my trip. This experience provoked a lot of emotions, particularly when viewing the photos I took and replaying the journey in my mind. Speaking of emotions - I suspect this will be my final Camino post, which in a way makes me sad as it seems like a chapter in my life is now over. But stay tuned until the end of the post for more on that idea!

The most common question I’ve gotten about my walk is whether I got out of it all that I hoped I would. To that, I can provide a resounding “yes”. It was clearly one of those experiences which you can’t fully understand before doing it, but my expectations were definitely met. It was a big ask of my family to spend three weeks away from them, and I certainly feel strongly that my time was spent as well as I’d hoped it would be. I hope that with time they’ll agree. While I’m still bearing some physical challenges that manifested from the walk, mentally and emotionally, my Camino bore tremendous fruit.

Mechanically, the Camino Portugués was a lot of fun. I enjoyed the challenges of walking the ~175 mile trail, making new friends, and most importantly, having so much “walking meditation” time alone with my thoughts. Yesterday, I got a lot of pleasure out of making a Google Map of my journey (courtesy of the GPX output files from my Garmin watch), along with one final Relive video (note that the 190 miles shown here includes the boat journey on the penultimate day). It was just really cool to remind myself just what my path looked like and all the places I saw!

But as you might have guessed, the inner journey was the one most important to me, and the one to which I’ll devote the remainder of this post. I received a number of comments from blog readers and YouTube viewers asking me to summarize what I learned from the walk. I gave a quick rundown of some of that in a recent Two Sides of Fi video. To expand further:

1. Be open to whatever the universe presents you with. Don’t waste energy trying to run scenarios of what might happen. You might be pleasantly surprised by what you can learn on a path you find yourself on that you’d never have predicted.

2. All we have is now. Focus on the current moment, as the past and future aren’t real to us at the present. Most of us spend far too much energy there vs. spent being present in the moment we’re actually in and which matters most!

3. Much of a challenge is mental. This is perhaps a very obvious statement but the Camino remind me just how many obstacles in life have 90% or more of their difficulty in our minds.

4. Relationships matter most of all. Again, to many this is like “Duh, right?” But there’s nothing like solo travel away from loved ones to remind you just how important and precious the time we have with people about whom we care, matters.

The first on this list was a stated goal from the very start of my journey. I’m one who is prone to over-analysis, worrying, and trying to plan for all possible outcomes. While SSRIs and therapy have given me much more awareness and increasingly control of this, I knew I’d need to dedicate brain cycles to being open to whatever the Camino threw at me. And I was generally happy with how well I did. I didn’t keep my video updates from the Camino going after the first few days, but if you saw any of them, I hope you’ll take away how well I did with the rain and other unpleasantries that are just facts of life on the trail. This truly was progress for me, I promise!

“All we have is now” is a concept I first heard a month prior to my walk via Eckhart Tolle’s 1999 bestseller, The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment. While I enjoy philosophy quite a bit, I don’t typically read what many would categorize as “new age” content. But this book was a referral from a trusted friend undergoing his own personal transformation, and so I readily grabbed the author-read audiobook on Audible. What a read! Parts of the book were harder to swallow, particularly towards the latter end of it. But the central thesis about living in this current moment, and how most of us waste so much energy pining for or worrying about the distant past or an uncertain future, is killer stuff! And the Camino only strengthened my belief in the power of this message. I’ve decided to re-read the book to think through this a bit more. But I encourage anyone, particularly those who struggle with troubled pasts or worries over the future to consider a read. Focusing on the present made so much of the Camino much more enjoyable. Colors really are brighter, and sights + sounds much lovelier, when you are truly present and focused on the world around you!

As mentioned, the latter two entries on my list are the more obvious conclusions from my walk. But particularly once my leg started bothering me on the Camino (don’t worry, I’ve sought medical care), and then got a cold, and I had to find ways to work through them, I was reminded how much of many struggles is mental. And to be clear, that’s not to diminish the challenges of mental struggles! But in this case, I had a goal in mind and was determined to achieve it. So this was often about the question of continuing or not, and what accommodations might need to happen in order to continue on. I never actually contemplated ending my walk. I knew I could take a rest day if I needed to, but didn’t end up needing it. I just rested when I had to, and remained open to my plans changing if they had to for any reason.

Finally, this was the longest I’ve ever been away from my wife and son. Sure, I used to travel plenty in my former career. But if my memory is correct, the longest stretch I’d ever been away was ten days in Southeast Asia, and this was more than twice as long as that. I still maintain that I needed to do this journey alone to maximize the benefit. Sure, I would have enjoyed the Camino a lot having my life partner, travel buddy, and amazing support system there with me! But I’m certain I wouldn’t have taken nearly enough time with my own thoughts on the walk if I’d had Lorri there. It would have been more of a hiking holiday than a personal journey - super fun, but less personal growth almost certainly. But now having this behind me, I don’t see much appeal in future solo trips. Sure, I’ll continue to find value in walking meditation. But I get a lot of benefit from that in day- or weekend-long walks.

One of my favorite things about the Camino was the people I met along the way. And I found that one of the most interest topics of conversation was each person’s “why” they were on the trail. Many were undergoing times of change in their lives and hoped to learn something from their journeys, or in several cases, to process grief from the loss of a loved one. Some were doing it just “to see if they could” i.e. to determine if they could meet the physical challenge. Still others were there simply supporting a partner who had caught Camino fever. While I walked alone nearly all of my Camino, the hours I spent with others at meals or just chatting at a hostel with fellow pilgrims, was another valuable example of how much relationships matter in life. I’m glad I followed the advice of other walkers to take pictures of the people you met on the journey. I hope I remember them all.

One last question I’ve been asked a few times: would you recommend the Camino to others? If the idea of a walk like this (or a longer one - see my earlier Camino posts) appeals to you, definitely! As mentioned in the 2SFI video, the infrastructure around the more popular Camino routes makes it a simpler prospect than other long hikes. Food, bathrooms, lodging, pharmacies, etc. are readily available along most of the route. That means you only really need to carry clothes, first aid supplies, and water. Sure, most people put more in their pack but the essentials list is pretty short. You can also tailor the route to your abilities and to the time you have available. That customization increases the likelihood of success since you can truly personalize the experience. Personal safety is also less of a concern than many fear, as there are almost always other people around, plenty of places to seek help, and at least on this route, ready cellphone signal if needed.

I’m really glad I did this walk. It’s too soon to make any sweeping declarations about how it’s changed me, but I believe it will demonstrate over time to have been super impactful to me, and be an important step in my own personal growth. Re-reading my posts from the walk have me thinking there just might be a book in my experience. I have no delusions that it would be popular or even a good read. But I think I’m going to try writing it up and I’m either gonna finish and put it out in the world, or I’ll give up because I’m not enjoying the process of writing. Both are totally fine with me!

As always, thanks for all your support. I really appreciated your positive comments during my walk and since I’ve returned. I didn’t share my thoughts to provoke this outcome, but I am certainly very appreciative of your kind words. Mahalo 🙏