How we decided where to live post-retirement: A discussion

Part 1:

Part 2:

We didn’t just throw a dart at a map and end up on the Central Coast of California, did we? Of course not! Those who have been following this blog for a while may recall that I’ve written about this topic previously. Re-reading that post, I think there’s plenty of good content in that article and I’d still recommend checking it out. But we can always improve on our work, right? To that end, our most recent Two Sides of FI episodes are a two-part series on this important topic. And in my opinion, the conversational format of our YouTube channel is a great match for this subject!

Of course not everyone chooses to relocate in retirement. They may well have a paid-off house in a town they love, have built up a network of good friends, and are very happy where they are. But particularly in the case of those who are on the FIRE path and elect to retire early, a move is often in the cards. This is commonly the case when one lives in a (very) high cost of living area, like the San Francisco Bay Area – as I did. My family really enjoyed the eight years we spent there, but had always planned to move to a lower cost of living area once I stopped working. That’s a great starting point, but how to proceed with the search to find a new home town, particularly when your options are so numerous?

To learn more about the process my family followed and how my show partner, Eric, is doing the same, please check out the videos linked above – or the podcast version (parts 1 and 2) If a move is definitely or likely to be in your own future plans, I think you’ll find value in the approach we discuss. If you would like a free copy of the “Where to Live” tool that we discuss, you can find one for download at the episode’s show notes.

The many learnings from year one of early “retirement”

ONE YEAR since I left my job? Wow. Particularly given the odd pace of “pandemic time”, I find it hard to believe I’m already at this point. But here I am! Looking back at the countdown calendar that formerly hung on my office wall confirms it. On an afternoon exactly one year ago today, I handed in my employee badge and drove out of the company parking lot, almost certainly bringing my 23-year biotech career to an end. A few weeks later my family moved out of the Bay Area to the Central Coast of California. I wrote my first blog post here several weeks later. Now after twelve months and 43 posts, it’s time for another in my series of milestone articles. Will it be my last? Who knows!

After a year I still generally avoid the term “retirement” or I place it in quotes as I’ve done here. At 47 years old, I still think it unlikely that I’m completely done with all things that could be termed “work”. It is true that I leveraged reaching financial independence to step away from the only career I’ve had – and still have no intentions of going back. But it’s also entirely possible that one of the many ideas I’m exploring could turn into gainful revenue generation. Again, who knows? That flexibility is exactly what I was targeting with my FIRE journey. That said, I can’t imagine myself schedule-bound to an office job at someone else’s company. ? It seems more likely with each day that this will continue to be the case.

I have approached this article differently than my earlier milestone posts. Instead of my usual (rambling) long-form, I will briefly summarize some of they key lessons I have learned and observations I’ve made. That seemed a better method to share a broad range of information without a really long article. I’m hopeful that this bite-sized approach will work out well and perhaps will provoke questions that would be fun to expand upon! So without further ado and in no particular order…


  • It can be very difficult to resist the temptation to fill all your time with “stuff”. Our careers train us in this way and it takes active effort to get comfortable with anything else. But I think that having truly “free time” is vital to allow the creative process to happen!
  • Like any big changes, leaving your career behind is an emotional roller coaster with many highs and lows. You can’t truly prepare for that, short of just being cognizant that the mental churn will happen and is completely normal. It’s really important to reflect on what you’re feeling. Journaling or blogging can help!
  • Talking openly with your partner & family is really important. Sharing the emotions you’re feeling helps everyone. After all, they are going through this huge change with you! Keeping it in will only create tension that helps nothing. Ask them how things are going now that you’re around so much more and see if anything needs to be adjusted.
  • If your identity is tightly wrapped up in your former job as is common, it will be a substantial change when this is removed. Thinking about your purpose and what defines you and is important now, is really useful. What is your next phase of life going to be about?
  • Don’t fear trying things and setting them down. This is the very heart of having the freedom to choose how to spend your time. If like me you have many interests, it’s perfectly OK to try them out only to decide “that’s enough for now” or “I don’t actually want to do this”.
  • Related to the above – it’s important not to pressure yourself to find “the next thing to do”. At least in my case, this created stress in the first few months. Financial independence means that additional income – while nice, is not required. Your time is better spent exploring, from which may spring that next great idea! But don’t rush into anything hastily.
  • It can be really tricky talking about FIRE and early retirement – particularly with people you’re meeting for the first time. I often refer to my increasingly rare consulting gigs as my “job”. Yes, it’s a cop-out, but it works before I get to know someone well. It’s worth thinking through how you will handle this in advance. You’ll get lots of practice, I promise you.
  • The things you miss about the workplace may surprise you. Giving some thought to this before you depart may help you identify other ways to satisfy those needs – but it won’t be perfect. Again, this is just part of the emotional roller coaster that will surely come.
  • Many workplace friendships are just that, and they won’t all persist after your shared work life is no longer there. COVID + moving certainly didn’t help in my case as visiting people wasn’t an option and Zoom meet-ups are only so effective. But I am convinced that many relationships at work are very much tied to the workplace itself. This is perfectly OK!
  • On a related point, it’s easy to under-appreciate how much socialization occurs at work. What will you do during those weekday “working hours” while your friends are busy? Finding appropriate avenues to engage with others is still really important. Clubs, civic groups, volunteering, and other means to find like-minded people is important – particularly if you relocate in retirement, as I did. Pouring wine at a tasting room one day a week is proving to be fun for me and plenty social!
  • Lots of people make bucket lists of big and small things they intend to do once they retire. I have found since leaving the workplace that I continue to generate ideas of things I might like to do. I keep these out of sight in an “idea funnel” that I revisit from time to time. It’s fun to see how my thoughts change about prioritization; there’s also no pressure to feel like it is a “to do list” that I must achieve. This subtle difference feels really good to me.
  • Building skills and “making” things are really effective ways of continuing to challenge yourself, to keep learning, and also to feel productive. They are also great mechanisms to unearth potential business opportunities or at least new hobbies and avenues of personal entertainment. Knocking procrastinated chores off your to-do list only lasts so long!
  • Just because someone is willing to pay (a lot) for your expertise doesn’t mean it’s the right thing to take on. I’m grateful to have been presented many consulting opportunities over the last year. While tempting, I’ve had to be really careful about not over-committing at the peril of being unable to do all the other things I want to do! Be sure to choose wisely.
  • The freedom gained via FIRE has proven to be well worth it! I love being able to choose how to spend my time. I can’t count how many times I’ve woken up with zero plans and at the end of the day realized what a fun day I had, just taking things as they come. My wife is much more spontaneous than me and I’m finally starting to understand the joy in this.
  • On a similar point, I’m really excited to finally get the chance to test out our interest in longer term travel. This summer we’ll take a five-week trip to visit family and friends. Wow! Like most Americans, we’ve never been away more than two weeks on vacation. It’s a little scary, but almost entirely in a good way!
  • There is no “right way” to do this. From talking to others, whether in FIRE or traditional age, retirement is definitely individual. We each have our goals, our interests, and our individual preferences. I think many of the points herein apply broadly. But you will each need to determine what is important to you and how you will spend this next phase of your life.

I hope you’ve found this post useful. I remain incredibly grateful to be in the position I am, something I reflect upon often. It is my earnest hope that in sharing my experiences I can assist others in their own journeys. Decisions relating to retirement are among the biggest we make in our adult lives. There are many paths to arrive at that goal and so many decisions to be taken along the way. And yet as has been well documented, few people feel well informed on the topic by the time they are deciding when and how to retire – or worse when others have decided that timing for them. I aspire to change that however I can.

Above all, I wish you all the best in your own journeys! If there are any questions that this post has prompted or areas in which you’d like me to dig in further, please comment below or on social media. I’ve learned much from the interactions I’ve had with readers and some of my favorite posts have comes from conversations with you. I just want more of them!

If you’re not yet following my Two Sides of FI YouTube channel (or the audio podcast version: Apple, Spotify, or search your provider of choice!), please consider it! My co-host, Eric, does a really great job of challenging me and asks thought-provoking, and sometimes difficult questions that I’m not always willing to put to myself. And I think you’ll find his perspective as one approaching FI incredibly valuable. Mahalo! ?